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Nights of Gethsemane by StarCrossed (31/?)

  • Feb. 1st, 2008 at 10:10 AM

I've gotten a lot of help. Thanks for all your offers.

I've been spending a lot of time studying the mating systems of various primates. It is making me want to write the sex scenes as a nature documentary. "And then Harry presented to Snape who mounted him." I went to tell this to one of my new betas over YIM and accidentally told my Dell representative instead! She was cool with it but I really need to stop working on my story at work...



Harry dreamt that he escaped and found Ron, Hermione and Ginny. They were all hunting the Horcruxes together. After hugs and kisses from the girls and pats on the back from Ron, Harry told them that he suspected the final Horcrux could be found at Hogwarts.


“I think I know where it is!” Ginny said breathlessly. “Luna told me about a special Ravenclaw artefact they had hidden away in their common room.”


“Let’s go!” Harry jumped on his broom and they all flew off towards Hogwarts.


“How will we sneak in?” Ginny asked once they landed on the Astronomy Tower.


“Harry’s invisibility cloak, of course!” Hermione pulled it out from her bag.


“Wow!” Harry grabbed it eagerly. “What else do you have?”


“Everything else of yours! I got it right before you were captured,” she answered with a smile.


“You are the best Hermione.” He threw the cloak over them and it was big enough to fit all four inside as they carefully snuck to the Ravenclaw common room.


“What’s the password?” he asked once they had reached the door.


“Chatelet,” Hermione answered immediately.


“Do you know everything?” Ron asked suspiciously.


“I overheard it.” Hermione marched them into the common room. Luna was there, doing her homework on the table.


“Hi Harry!”


Harry whipped off his cloak. “How did you know it was me?”


“You’re the only invisible student at Hogwarts. Have you joined Ravenclaw too?”


“No.” Ginny emerged from the cloak followed by Ron and Hermione. “We are trying to find Voldemort’s Horcrux. Any idea where it could be?”


“Horcruxes…." Luna breathed. "My dad told me all about those. The soul will be found in a needle, which is enclosed in an egg, which is in a bird, which is stuffed inside a rabbit, which is hidden within a fox, which is tucked away in a chest, which is over there.” She pointed and they all turned to look at it. “But be careful. If you open the chest, the fox will run away. If you catch the fox, the rabbit will go down into its burrow. If you dig for the rabbit, the bird will fly off. If you net the bird, you have to cut out the egg and make an omelette and then you will find the needle.”


They all looked at each other in exasperation.


“Let’s just cut the whole thing in half with the sword,” Ron suggested.


“Brilliant idea,” Harry agreed.

Harry grabbed the sword and chopped the chest through the middle. A horrible shrieking sound filled the air and the ends of the chest burnt up in huge flames that spread all the way to the ceiling. Harry grabbed Ginny and pulled her to the ground, shielding her with his body as Ron did the same for Hermione. Once all the flames had disappeared, Harry cautiously lifted his head and found Luna still calmly doing her homework and a huge crater where the chest had been.


“Well, we now have to go kill Nagini and Voldemort. Thanks, Luna.”


“Watch out for Nargles,” she said dreamily.


The sharp sizzling sound of a spell raced towards him and Harry barely managed to roll out of bed, ending up on the floor in an undignified heap of blankets. Snape fired off another and Harry scrambled quickly across the tiles. “I’m awake! I’m awake!”


Snape shot a third one at him before stepping through the bars. Harry remained on the other side of the toilet, staring suspiciously at Snape over the rim.


“Come, eat your breakfast,” ordered Snape as he spelled food on the table and took his chair, his back to Harry.


Harry stood. He quietly grabbed his mouthwash and lugged it at the back of Snape’s head. It stopped in midair although Snape didn’t even turn around.


“You will have to try harder than that, Potter,” he challenged.


Harry plucked the bottle out of the air and returned it to the sink. “How did you know I threw it?”


“You held your breath in your attempt to be silent,” Snape explained as he sipped his tea.


Harry took his chair and buttered his toast. “How did you learn to be so stealthy?”


“Years of practice. I also paid attention to the mistakes my students made. Overcompensation is the most common error. For example, students who normally never gaze at faces will often stare directly into people’s eyes while lying.”


Harry tried to remember if he did that. “I’ll tell you two truths and a lie, and you try to guess which one is which.”


Snape nodded at him.


Harry put down his toast and looked Snape straight in the eyes. “My favourite food is treacle tart. I once wanked on top of the Astronomy Tower under my Invisibility Cloak. I saw a drunken house elf at Hogwarts.”


“The second,” Snape guessed correctly.


“How did you know?” Harry asked incredulously.


“You added too many details,” Snape explained.


“Your turn.” Harry finished off his orange juice.


“Finish your breakfast and we will begin training,” Snape said firmly.


“You’re no fun,” Harry complained, but he hurried over to the sink. “I feel fine; I don’t think I need any other potions.”


Snape produced two from his robes. “Take these, just in case.”


Harry quaffed them down. They tasted especially nasty and he couldn’t help but make a face. “Gross!” He rushed over to the sink and poured half the mouthwash bottle’s contents into his mouth.


Snape watched in amusement as Harry desperately tried to replace the taste in his mouth with mint.


“I swear you make those things nastier and nastier each time,” Harry said when he had finally managed to cover up the taste.


“They work, do they not?” Snape pointed out.


“Yeah, they do,” Harry acknowledged. He had been impressed by Snape’s ability to heal him but he didn’t dare inform the older wizard of that fact or else he’d never hear the end of it. “What d’you have planned for today’s lessons?”


“You will aim while dodging again,” Snape informed him as he cleared the table and led Harry out of his cell.


“Can we have our contest after that?”


“The letter for the day is ‘n,’” Snape said as he stepped into the practice room and spelled the balls to fly along the walls.


“Eeennn?” Harry asked, frowning. “But that’s … not simple.”


“It’s either ‘n’ or ‘b.’” Snape handed Harry the laser pointer after he finished enlarging the balls that represented Death Eaters.


“Okay, then I will use the letter that I do not want to use,” Harry grudgingly agreed.


“Which is?” prompted Snape.


“The one that is next to ‘m’!”


Snape spelled the exercise to start and Harry dodged out of the way of six balls at once. His aim had improved dramatically and he had to admit that Snape had been right when he insisted that Harry focus on aiming while he was injured. He still had to hide behind furniture while he shot down the balls that represented Death Eaters, but he didn’t miss once he targeted one. Snape replaced the ones he shot down and maintained the exercise while Harry attempted to remain out in the open for longer periods of time.


He still needed cover to aim by the time Snape stopped the exercise for lunch. Harry sprawled out on the floor, disappointed with himself. He knew that it was unrealistic for him to expect to be able to master this particular exercise in one day, but he had hoped to be able to aim without cover at least once. He had the feeling that this exercise was a step beyond him and that he needed to master a simpler form first.


When Snape returned with tuna sandwiches and milk, Harry lay on the floor and frowned at his lunch while he tried to think of a way to work an ‘n’ word into his sentence.


“Don’t hurt yourself. What are you trying to say?” Snape asked.


Harry struggled to think of a word. “I was thinking that maybe …. Perhaps I should … It might be better if … Ineedtotrysomethingelse!”


“Excuse me?” Snape arched an eyebrow at him.


Harry sat up, proud that he had found a way to speak his mind. “I think I need to try an easier form of this exercise first. I need to first practise aiming while running around without the balls. Once I finish that, then I’ll move on to the next exercise, the one we just did.”


“You used ‘need’ twice,” Snape complained.


Harry lost his patience. “It was hard enough just to think of that!”


“You didn’t say an ‘n’ word, and I know you didn’t think before you spoke.” Snape frowned at him disapprovingly.


He hadn’t. Harry tore into his sandwiches, spilling cucumbers and tomatoes all over his plate as he ate ferociously. Yet another lesson he hadn’t mastered despite days of practice. He wanted to request that Snape follow the same rules as him so that he could pick up a larger vocabulary, but he couldn’t figure out how to request it with an ‘n’ word.


“Please, can I not do ‘n’ and do ‘s’ instead?” he requested. “I promise I will think before saying the ‘s’ words.”


“Potter-” Snape started to growl.


“Look, it’s not my fault!” Harry interrupted in frustration. “You had a friend who gave you all those books and encouraged you to read. My relatives never read anything but the telly guide and those trashy celebrity magazines. The nearest bookshop to me was over eight miles away, and I wasn’t allowed to go there on my own anyway. If I had someone like your friend, then maybe I would have a vocabulary like you, but I didn’t. I’m trying but it’s difficult.” He stared at his plate, expecting Snape to insult his intelligence or complain that he didn’t use enough ‘n’ words.


“You will use ‘s’ for the rest of the day,” Snape allowed. “‘N’ is obviously above your level.”


Harry breathed a sigh of relief. “You know, it would help if you also spoke whatever word I was supposed to use that day in each of your sentences.”


“I fear you would simply copy my speech.”


“I won’t just say the same things as you,” promised Harry, growing more confident in himself.


“Then I shall strive to serve similar standards,” Snape agreed.


Harry gaped at him in astonishment. “Go ahead and be smug. You’ve easily got me beaten at this lesson.”


“It’s a shame,” Snape sipped his tea. “I always prefer a challenge, as simplicity bores me.”


“Same for me.” Harry finished off his sandwiches. As eager as he was for his next lesson, he was far more eager for what would probably come after it – sex. His dick, pressed against the carpet, agreed with him firmly. Suddenly, he thought of something. “You know, doesn’t Voldemort think it strange that you only show him visions of us having sex in my bed? If you are going to pretend that you allow me upstairs for ‘depraved purposes,’ then shouldn’t you give him at least one memory where we are having sex up here?”


“I am sceptical that his suspicion would fall on such practices. He seldom examines the memories in detail,” Snape admitted.


“Then why d’you always insist that we have a … straight session?” Harry asked suspiciously.


“In case he should desire to examine that memory with more scrutiny.”


“I still think he would be suspicious if we never have sex up here,” Harry persisted. Now that the idea had completely formed in his head, he eagerly wanted to try it out.


“The bed is perfectly suitable,” Snape insisted in a sooty tone, gazing down at Harry with a haughty expression on his face.



Harry had the feeling that Snape was refusing to have sex in the practice room because he was fearful of being caught by visiting Death Eaters. There were few things that gave Harry as much pleasure as much as making Snape do sexual things he didn’t want to do. However, Harry knew very well that as soon as Snape realised that refusing to agree to Harry’s suggestions just made Harry persist in asking for them, Snape would stop saying ‘no.’ Harry had to convince Snape without letting Snape know what exactly he was doing.

“But…." Harry picked his words carefully. "You always say that I should play the submissive slave. And I know, I should and I try to. I just think, if you make a claim, you should back it up as long as you can and I won’t be hurt. If you are scared of being caught, then just put up wards and stuff.”


Snape bristled at being accused of being a coward, and Harry knew he had him.


“Potter, I am not the one who specifically requested that such activities should not be performed outside of your cage,” Snape reminded him coldly.


Harry had the feeling Snape was trying to infuriate him so that he’d forget his plan. “Yes, but I hadn’t quite learned how things worked then, had I? I understand now that I have to play my role and I don’t want us to get caught because we forgot some stupid little thing like not having sex here.”


Snape flicked his wand and the dishes disappeared. “If you are able to aim while staying out in the open, then I will grant you your wish.”


Harry snatched up the laser pointer. “Sure. I’m ready.”


Snape immediately attacked Harry, but the young wizard easily sidestepped the projectiles. Harry was determined to beat this exercise even if it killed him. He remained out in the open and began to target the Death Eaters when they crept into the corner of his vision. He’d turn towards them as soon as he spotted one in the corner of his eyes and aim while the black blob was straight between his eyes. As he was shooting on the fly, rather than carefully aiming, his shots were rather erratic and he missed far more than he had before. Still, he knew that he would never be able to win this contest if he maintained his old tactics.


Harry tried for hours and didn’t succeed. Finally, just when he was about to admit defeat, he shot blindly at one of the Death Eaters and managed to knock it down. “I did it! I actually did it!”


“That was luck rather than skill,” protested Snape, but Harry had the feeling he wasn’t as upset as he was pretending to be.


“But I proved I could do it, right?” Harry pointed out, determined to have some form of positive acknowledgement.


“Yes, you actually succeeded,” admitted Snape.


“Oi! Don’t sound so surprised!” Harry looked around the room. “How d’you want to do this?”


“Get on the sofa,” Snape ordered as he took out his wand and began casting wards.


Harry stretched out on the largest couch, watching as Snape set up far more defences than he possibly needed. Harry had been right; Snape was worried about being walked in on. He had grown flaccid during his lesson, but he re-hardened while he watched Snape mutter to himself as he cast the spells. He wondered if Snape would demand repayment for the blowjobs now. He hoped not, but he would do it if Snape requested.


Finally, Snape approached Harry. He avoided looking at Harry’s eyes as he settled on the couch beside Harry’s left hip, still fully clothed. Harry wanted him to undress as well, but he had had so much difficulty getting Snape to agree to this in the first place, he dared not press his luck.


Snape’s long fingers slid up to capture Harry’s nipples as he bent down his head to mouth Harry’s collarbone. Harry threw back his head and closed his eyes in pleasure as Snape plucked the delicate nubs until they were stiff with excitement. Snape slowly rolled them between his fingers as his hot mouth slowly worked its way down to Harry’s right nipple. Harry bit his lip to keep from crying out in pleasure as he arched his back, trying to get Snape to move his mouth faster.


Snape’s lips closed around his nipple just as he released it from his fingers. Harry grabbed the couch to stop from grabbing Snape and moaned in pleasure. Snape’s free hand slid down to Harry’s left knee as he sucked on the small pebble, biting it lightly. Harry panted with pleasure as he felt Snape’s fingers slowly slide up his thighs to his groin. He parted for him, wanting Snape to take his heavy cock in his talented hands. Snape ignored the hardness, his fingers sliding downward to brush over Harry’s entrance. Harry’s fingers dug into the couch as Snape’s middle finger slowly stroked his puckered hole with light circles.


Just when he thought he couldn’t stand it anymore, Snape cast the cleaning and lubrication spells without lifting his head from Harry’s swollen nipple. He pushed his finger inside and Harry pressed back against him. Snape’s mouth released Harry’s right nipple and slowly made its way to Harry’s left as a second finger joined the first and they both began to fuck Harry slowly.


“Fuck!” He was so excited, he was afraid he was going to come on Snape’s fingers alone, especially when Snape began rubbing that spot between his balls. “Stop. Stop,” he gasped and Snape’s fingers and mouth paused. Harry was embarrassed then. He wanted Snape to go inside, because he was afraid that he’d come twice, but he didn’t want to say ‘fuck me’ like some sort of pervert.


He closed his eyes, his face flaming, and muttered “do it,” hoping that Snape would understand what he meant and that he wouldn’t be forced to explain further. Luckily, Snape seemed to understand because he removed his fingers and left the couch.


“Kneel on the couch, facing the wall,” Snape instructed, and Harry opened his eyes and did as Snape requested. Snape walked around the room, making sure the wards were still intact. Finally satisfied that there was no way the two of them were going to be walked in on, Snape approached the couch again. Harry waited impatiently while Snape stripped off his outer robe, folding it carefully, and draping it over a chair. It always took forever for Snape to get undressed because of all the layers and buttons he wore. Harry bit his lip to prevent himself from saying something stupid or embarrassing. Luckily, Snape did not undress all the way. Before long, he approached Harry, still mostly dressed.


Snape put a hand on the small of Harry’s back and another on his upper thigh, and moved him slightly so that his arse was sticking out. Harry felt the head of Snape’s cock press against his opening. Then Snape grabbed his hips and thrust inside as he held Harry in place. Harry gasped as he was suddenly stretched and filled completely in one single stroke. It didn’t hurt. In fact, it felt rather amazing, especially when Snape began to thrust. Snape fucked him steadily, his strokes deep and hard. Harry would’ve been knocked forward into the couch if Snape hadn’t been gripping his hips so securely. Harry moaned as Snape hit that spot perfectly, his cock dripping steadily.


Ordinarily, Harry always hurried them both along, grabbing his prick as soon as he felt ready to blow and squeezing around Snape to encourage him to come faster. Now, he wanted to enjoy it, since it seemed foolish to rush the few forms of pleasure he found in this place. He forced himself to keep his hands on the top of the couch rather than putting them on his desperate prick. He clutched the edge of the couch so hard his knuckles were white as Snape rocked into him.


Snape seemed to read Harry’s mind as he kept his pace steady and did not try to hurry Harry along like he normally did. Harry moaned with pleasure at the way Snape was fucking him, but he knew it could get even better. Shifting around so that Snape could strike him just right, Harry slid his right leg up to lie on the armrest. The change in angle allowed Snape to go in deeper, and the older wizard began to really pound into Harry. He was slamming into him so hard, and Harry could think of nothing but how amazing it felt to be fucked like that. Fuck, yes! Oh god, that was just what he wanted! His fingers dug into the couch.


Snape was fucking him harder than he had ever been fucked in his life. Harry had lost himself in the pleasure of it, crying out loudly with each inward stroke. He was vaguely aware that he was shouting nonsensical things like ‘fuck me!’ but he was far too focused on the euphoria of it all to try to make himself be sensible. He was so close. So very close. He knew that if he just reached his hand down and grabbed his heavy cock he would come but he wanted Snape to do it. He wanted Snape’s long fingers to curl around his prick and bring him to completion. Just thinking about it made his cock pulse and a particularly loud cry escaped from his throat.


Snape, still thrusting like a jackhammer, leaned forward, and growled in Harry’s ear. “Shut up. We don’t wa-”


Harry never heard what they didn’t want because something about Snape’s voice sent off shivers all over his body as if a dam had suddenly burst open inside him. A waterfall of ecstasy filled him up and burst out his dick. He lost himself all over the couch, his cry of pleasure caught in his throat, as the force of his orgasm took him hard. He hadn’t even touched his dick and yet he was spurting as he only had that first time on the drug. “Oh god! Oh god!” he heard himself saying as he was pressed against the back of the couch and he was vaguely aware that Snape was coming too.


“Fuck!” gasped Snape as he came but Harry was too brain dead to marvel at this novelty. He and Snape lay draped over the edge of the couch together for a moment, both of their hearts beating out of their chests. Finally, Snape pulled out of Harry. Harry scooted as far as he could to the side so that Snape could lie down on the couch and then he collapsed on top of Snape, his chest pressed against Snape’s, and his head tucked under Snape’s chin. Snape’s right hand lazily draped over Harry’s back.


“You did it,” Harry informed him once he had managed to catch his breath.


“Did what?” Snape asked, his own still not yet back to normal.


“Fucked my brains out.”


“It’s a good thing you had almost none to begin with, or else we’d really be in trouble,” Snape said dryly, and Harry punched him in the arm.


“Shut up.”


Harry closed his eyes again and pressed his head against Snape’s sternum, not caring that he was probably getting impressions of buttons in his cheek. They lay like that for several minutes. He allowed himself to drift off in the pleasure of having another body pressed against his own. He preferred to lie against Snape while they both were naked but he could still feel Snape’s heat through his thick robes.


Snape had to ruin it by pushing Harry off of him and onto the floor. “You’re heavy,” was his flimsy excuse as he cast Scourgify and grabbed up his outer robe from the chair. “I need a shower.”


“Me too,” Harry agreed from the floor.


Snape nudged him with his foot. “Get up.”


“You’re destroying my afterglow,” Harry complained, not moving from his spot.


“Up or we shall never repeat this,” Snape ordered firmly.


Harry instantly opened his eyes and climbed to his feet. He followed Snape down to the bathroom, walking unsteadily.


“What’s wrong? Are you hurt?” Snape frowned at him.


“I’d like to see you try to walk straight after switching positions with me,” Harry challenged him.


“Tch, I doubt you’d last five minutes,” Snape shot back.


“I’d last a hell of a lot longer than that,” Harry promised as he stepped into the bathtub and turned on the shower. Snape stepped past him and retrieved the muscle potion from the spelled cabinet. He set it on the edge of the tub before he took his chair and pulled out one of his books.


Harry felt so relaxed as the warm water cascaded over him. He wanted to curl up on his bed with Snape and sleep for hours. He pulled back his foreskin to clean his penis, but the normally needy organ had been very satisfied and he doubted he’d be able to get hard again for a while even if he tried.


Snape was completely engrossed in his book, and Harry watched him read as he soaped himself. He was glad that Snape had gotten over his disgust for gayness. He still wouldn’t look Harry in the eyes, but he no longer was quick to remove himself from Harry’s presence. Harry was also glad that Snape no longer spoke of sex with Harry as if it were the most disgusting thing he had ever done. He certainly was much more agreeable to the whole process than he had been at the beginning. Harry wondered if Snape had missed having sex orgasms while they were away from each other as much as Harry did. He supposed so, as he didn’t think Snape would be able to find a sexual partner easily. He was rather ugly.


Maybe Snape was more agreeable now that he was finally getting laid regularly. Harry knew it was hard for him to stay angry or upset after having such wonderful orgasms. He was certain Snape enjoyed them too, even if he wouldn’t admit or acknowledge it openly. Snape now had two very good reasons to keep Harry alive, healthy and happy. If Harry suddenly decided to refuse to sleep with Snape, he had the feeling that he would be hurting Snape more than he’d be hurting himself. Not that he minded it much anymore. Snape could’ve been so cruel to Harry if he’d wanted to make the experience miserable. He was forbidden from causing Harry physical pain, but he could chain him down like he did at the beginning. Or force him to perform humiliating acts. Or fuck him in front of the other Death Eaters. Snape hadn’t even asked Harry for his blowjob yet, although he didn’t seem to be so keen on giving them himself, which Harry understood. Still, a ratio of at least two to one was fairly generous since Snape had no reason to give them anymore now that Harry had learned to relax on his own.



At the very least, Harry could give Snape a hand job. Snape had always been very generous with giving pleasure to Harry and not asking for any in return. Harry had never even seen Snape’s ejaculate. He was rather curious about it. Was it thick and white like his own? He wouldn’t let Snape come in his mouth but he wouldn’t mind finishing him off by hand. If they weren’t performing for Voldemort, Harry would’ve suggested that they give each other hand jobs or try the sixty-nine position he saw in the book.


Harry stepped out of the tub as Snape closed his book and tucked it back in his robes.


“What were you reading?” he asked curiously as he towelled himself off and then picked up the vial of muscle potion.


“Wuthering Heights,” Snape answered as he helped Harry rub the potion onto his back.


“What’s it about?”


“A man, named Heathcliff, who falls in love with a beautiful woman. She says she loves him, but chooses to marry Heathcliff’s worst enemy instead. Swearing revenge, he sets upon a course of action which results in the death of his beloved and her husband. Their offspring, a daughter with her father’s features and mother’s eyes, becomes his charge and he treats her as his slave, making her life miserable.”


“Sounds silly.”


“What makes you proclaim it such?” Snape asked as he stepped away from Harry to wash his hands in the sink.


Harry stood and wrapped the towel around his waist. “If he loved her then he wouldn’t have gotten her killed! He obviously didn’t love her if he knew what he was doing would make her die.”


“Do you mean to say that if you left here only to find that Miss Weasley had taken up with young Malfoy during your absence, you would wish them both well?” Snape asked as they walked back to Harry’s cell.


“Oh come on, Ginny has better taste than that,” Harry scoffed.


“Women are fickle creatures. Imagine this: you are gone and possibly dead while he remained by her side to hold her hand and comfort her.” Snape spelled food on the table and sat across from Harry. “Or perhaps, a night of shared passion inflamed her, and now she can not imagine living without him. Stranger things have happened during times of war.”


“Ginny wouldn’t do that,” Harry stubbornly insisted. “She’s not like that.” But even as he protested, he couldn’t help but wonder. He didn’t know Ginny all that well. He didn’t know her favourite classes, what foods she preferred to eat, or even what she wanted to be after she graduated from Hogwarts. During their time together, they hadn’t talked about anything at all really, just silly stuff. Still, Draco … augh. No way, not with Draco. Snape was just trying to freak him out. Or was he? Did Snape know something Harry didn’t? Harry looked up at Snape sharply. “Why? What have you heard?”


Snape looked satisfied as he sipped his tea. “It was a mere suggestion. I do wonder how you would react though. You are always so quick to define what is and isn’t love for others.”


Harry was certain Snape was just fucking with him. “If Ginny did do that, which she wouldn’t, I wouldn’t try to make their lives miserable. Since I love her, I want her to be happy and safe, even if that means she won’t be with me,” Harry pressed on, feeling more confident in himself. “I mean, that’s why I broke up with her at the end of my sixth year, because I was afraid that she would get hurt if she stayed with me.”


“Did you?” Snape arched his eyebrow at Harry.


“Yeah, that’s what you are supposed to do if you love someone,” Harry explained. “You should want them to be happy and healthy, even if what helps them makes you miserable.”


“Even if you were certain that Draco would eventually cause harm to Ginny?” Snape pressed on.


“If you know something, then you should tell me!” Harry demanded.


“It was mere talk,” Snape responded as he stood up to leave.


Harry stared at him suspiciously.


“We will train in the morning.” Snape walked off.


Harry watched him leave then turned back to his food. He puzzled over the conversation in his head while he finished off his meal and prepared for bed. There was no way Ginny had left him for Draco. They hated each other. No, Ginny would be waiting for him. She had loved him ever since she was a little girl and a few months apart wouldn’t change her feelings for him. He’d leave this place and go to her. Snape was just jealous.


Feeling secure in his relationship, Harry climbed in bed and fell asleep.



Chapter 1 ... 30 31 32 33 34

Comments

( 41 comments — Leave a comment )
[info]mystic_fairy012 wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 06:44 pm (UTC)
hey i thought that you would like to see this. . .
[Now], he wanted to enjoy it [now though], since it seemed foolish to rush the few forms of pleasure he found in this place.
you should either pick the first [now] or stick with only [now though]
[info]mystic_fairy012 wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 06:45 pm (UTC)
okay now i can get to my praising you. . . this was a great addition, i cannot wait for the next chapter, it is truly painful to have to wait but i know that it is hard to get it corrected with no beta.
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 06:54 pm (UTC)
Now it's more finding time to write x.x The next chapter is a cliffy and the one after that is HUUUGE so I want to have them perfect before I post them.
[info]mystic_fairy012 wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 07:02 pm (UTC)
well i have some free time with weekend, and if you needed me to i could try to correct them for grammer and word choice things like that
[info]japonicastar wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 09:00 pm (UTC)
Well I noticed two Brit-pick things:

“The nearest bookstore to me was over ten kilometres away”

We use miles like the US and unlike the rest of Europe. So ten miles would sound better to me. The other word I'd change would be bookstore,we use the word bookshop. Actually we don't generally use the word 'store' come to think about it.

“You’ve easily got me beat at this lesson.”

Us Brit always make words longer, in this case its the beat. We use beaten,
or written or... well I can't think of any others off hand but I see them often in fanfcs.

Anyway safe to say that I loved, loved, loved this chapter. They are starting to become comfortable with each other. And as soon Severus looks Harry in th eye it will be perfect. :)
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 10:34 pm (UTC)
Thank you. I thought I had changed that beaten thing but I guess not. I need to be more careful when I post chapters. Now I'm trying to think if I used 'store' earlier but I can't remember x.x

Yes.... this is the closest it has come to consensual sex yet!
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 10:09 pm (UTC)
Fantastic! I was looking at my email hoping you'd have an chapter out soon. It was awful waiting the extra days.

First some corrections I noticed for this chapter:

"Luna told me about a special Ravenclaw artefact they had hidden away in their common room.” The word "artefact" is spelled "artifact"

“I am sceptical that his suspicion would fall on such practices. He seldom examines the memories in detail,” Snape admitted. "sceptical is spelled "skeptical"

Finally the Ravenclaw common room password really wouldn't be a password. Ravenclaws had a question they needed to answer correctly before they were allowed into their common room, it wouldn't be just one password. But since it's a dream and Harry wouldn't know about how Ravenclaws entered their common room, I suppose the way you wrote it makes sense :)







[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 10:48 pm (UTC)
My spellcheck which is set to UK English corrected artifact and skeptical to the spelling I used there. So I assume those are the British spellings but I will double check.

I know about the Ravenclaw room and, as you guessed, I deliberately miswrote their entrance to reflect Harry's ignorance. There are symbolic aspects I sometimes put in the dreams that Harry would not be aware of and are there to give the reader a greater understanding of the situation (for example, the symbolism of flowers in the next chapter), but most of what Harry dreams about is limited by his knowledge.
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 10:50 pm (UTC)
Ah, OK. I didn't know that's how they spelled those words. I thought of it after I posted, but wasn't sure. Learn something new every day :)
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 10:27 pm (UTC)
Comments about the chapter- I've never read Wuthering Heights. Damn if JKR didn't take the story and change the characters of Heathcliff etc, into Snape's story. Not very original much?

Snape may have liked the thrill of being caught to an extent even though he wouldn't admit it. He's a spy though so I also suppose anyone finding out what he was doing would be stressful, and part of the fun ;P I also think that Harry being so aroused by how Snape was making him feel really affected Snape. I think his "Fuck!" was of how great it felt to be with Harry than just the sex. Something that possibly Snape didn't expect. And if Snape's voice in my ear wouldn't send shivers throughout my body too, ha! ^_^

I loved the teasing the two of them had after sex. Neither of them took each other seriously even though they still got their little comments in :) Harry laying on the floor acting goofy was funny too. And it was funny how Harry's comment of "evil man" was regulated to Snape ruining Harry's afterglow moment. So cute ^_^

It's funny that all of Harry's thoughts about how Snape is more relaxed about gay sex etc, is really a reflection of Harry's own feelings about the whole situation. He isn't much of a deep thinker to realize that it's the same process he's going through.

I also enjoy how Snape is getting Harry to think outside the box when it comes to how people relate to each other. How in stressful situations, decisions and reactions aren't always cut and dried. That people will sometimes do the incorrect thing, or things that most people couldn't picture themselves doing.

Hope you're able to find some free time soon to make more new chapters. I figure if your betas take longer to read through your work, you'll have time to write while the chapters are being reviewed. So even if we don't get to see the chapters right away, they're all lined up to be posted :)
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 11:00 pm (UTC)
My mother brought up the Snape and Heathcliff comparison to me during one of our conversations about Snape and I had to go read the summaries and wiki notes immediately. As soon as I saw that the child had her father's features and mother's eyes, I knew I had to put it in my work somehow. I thought it would be very interesting to have Snape read it and how he would react to it.

It's very hard to stay disinterested or de-attached when you have a very eager and vocal partner. If Snape wasn't interested in it near the start, he certainly was very interested in it by the end.

I almost took the "evil man" comment out because I thought it might be a bit too cute or silly but my betas are always telling me that I need to remember that my primary audience for this is women and that I should try to keep that in mind when writing my work because I have a tendency to write them towards how I think they would act and what would be most realistic rather than what the audience would enjoy the most.

After so much time together, Harry and Snape are both becoming very reflective of the other's moods. If Snape still expressed heavy disinterest or dislike for sex then Harry would have trouble getting into it too.

I do wonder how Harry would react if Ginny ran off with Draco. I think he would seethe about it but not do anything overt against Draco. Maybe cast a few nasty spells behind his back if they happened across each other in public.

I'm hoping to post the next three chapters close together. If not the next three, then the next two because of the nature of them.

I'm starting to write towards the end which is rather difficult for me because I love writing and I don't want it to end but I can't keep writing it forever. I'm afraid that as soon as I finish it I will have a great idea and be disappointed that I can't stick it in my fic. I think I'll try and do the Snape section after this. We will see how busy I am.
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 11:13 pm (UTC)
I did think a bit that the "evil man" comment didn't sound quite like Harry would normally speak. I prefer they'd talk like they normally would or act. Leaving it out or Harry saying something less "cutsie" would be nice. I wonder, should writers write to please themselves, or the readers?

That would be an interesting short fanfic, Harry losing Ginny to Draco, lol ^_^

I'll hate it when this story ends. Especially since you appear to have it ending as it did in DH :( I think Ginny should dump Harry, and Harry live with Snape snarkily ever after, hahaha! ^_^

[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 11:52 pm (UTC)
You think so? Maybe I will take it back out. I'll think about possible substitutions.

Mostly I write for me, but I also realize you can't frustrate the readers too much. PLus, now that I am getting comments, I love it and when I don't get a lot of feedback on a chapter I thought was really good it makes me sad.
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 11:59 pm (UTC)
Yeah, when I read what Harry said I thought "That's cute", but then I felt that it didn't really sound like him. My insides got all "squiky" because Harry didn't run true to the character you had written so far. Like he had seriously gotten into his role of a "girl" and was even talking like it. I was sort of confused for a moment. I don't want my comments to sound super critical, but those were all the thoughts and feelings that ran through me as I read the line.

I love to give comments as you've noticed ;) Although I don't want to go overboard to the point that you're thinking "Oh no, not her again!" if you haven't already O.o
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 01:39 am (UTC)
Oh no!! I love comments. It's great that you had that reaction because I was kind of thinking it might have that effect but it wasn't sure. I don't want Harry to turn into a girl!!! That's what I dislike most about reading slash.

I took it out right now. I haven't decided yet if I am going to replace it with another line.

Feel free to give me any other advice. As I've said before, I am still editing and writing it.

About Snape... I assumed that he was scared because he thought he was going to die without making sure Harry was okay and knew what he needed to know. WHen Harry showed up, he gave him his memories and decided to pass on.

I don't know... like you I sort of assumed that, as a paranoid git and a potions master, he would've been able to save himself from a bite from Nagini if he really needed to. Then again, Voldemort didn't stay around to make sure Snape died but he wasn't the sharpest of villians.
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 02:39 am (UTC)
The sentence reads a lot better now. I get the impression that Harry doesn't want to miss out on another session like the one he had, and that Snape is still somewhat in control of the sex situation.

Harry instantly opened his eyes and climbed to his feet

I was wondering if you think that maybe substituting the word "got" for "climbed" would work better? Somehow the word climbed doesn't sound quite right to me, even though I know it works. "Got" gives me more an image of movement. Climbed reminds me of Harry climbing over something to get somewhere.

Soooooo... it's possible Snape didn't die and just disappeared even though Harry thought he died ;) Snape may have been very, very, comatose and someone saved him. I live in the land of De-ni-le, hahaha!
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 03:20 am (UTC)
You think got would be better? I used climbed because it was a bit unsteady. He was on his back, and then he rolled over to his side and then on his hands and knees and then he stood up, rather than other times, when he would've just pushed his legs back and propelled himself upright.

I'm 100% confident Snape died in the book which is what made him so appealing to me as a character. I can see why you fans who liked the series before his death would want to find a way for him to live.

I am curious as to what about my story so far makes you think that I am writing to the ending in the book. You are the second person to post that and I am wondering what has led you to that conclusion.
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 03:44 am (UTC)
Hmmm, it's just my impression of the word "got". What matters is the impression you wanted to give. In this explanation to me, you fleshed out the way in which Harry got to his feet, by rolling over etc. In the story you only said "climbed". It sounded to me like he was on his back and "levitated" upwards onto his feet. If you added the action using some kind of the description you mentioned He was on his back, and then he rolled over to his side and then on his hands and knees and then he stood up, then the sentence with the word "climbed" would make more sense. I hope what I'm trying to say is making sense itself :)

I love Snape and Remus. The thought that they both died kills me, especially when Lucius got away :( That's why I like fanfic. I've read some versions that fit my idea of how the book should've ended better. I've decided that JKR is a bad writer of death scenes and endings.

I remember reading one of your commentaries way back in the early chapters that mentioned you having to work this story into the plot line of the ending of DH, and how you were figuring out how to do that. So I guessed that you were going to use the ending of the book and have this story fit in there somewhere. If you can have a happy Snarry ending, that would make me happy ^_^ But you seem more like a realist, so I'll have to wait and see how you end the story.
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 10:17 am (UTC)
Yeah....it's the problem I have with writing. I see everything in my head perfectly. I know the furniture that is in each room, exactly how the stitches look on Harry's clothing, every single dish that Harry eats, etc. Also, when I am writing, 'in the zone' I feel what they feel so I then try to translate those feelings into words. Trying to get these things out of my head and onto the paper is the hard part. Maybe I should try to explain it more in text so the reader can see the difference between this time and the very quick, efficient way Harry normally gets to his feet. Auuugh, this is why I picked a profession that where this type of writing doesn't matter!

Lupin was soooo different int he 7th book! It was quite a shock to me. I've met a lot of other fans.

Ooooh, okay. You see, waaaaay back when I was visualizing this fic (before I even started writing) in Sept, I originally intended it to be rather short and to fit in DH at a set part. So you could read DH up to a part, stop, read my story, then return to DH and finish it up but it would be a lot better than the book. [I just went back and found a chat where I proposed my fic and I am laughing at how different it has become from how I first intended it] I wrote the first few chapters with that intent before I fleshed out my Harry and Snape and decided to scrapping that idea in favor of the one I am working on now due to how I changed the character of Snape.

So I was freaking out because I was wondering if I had written something in the first few chapters that gave that impression still or if I had said something somewhere that people were reading.

By working it into the plot line now, I meant that I wanted certain scenes to take place at certain points when they did in the original book and I also wanted Hogwarts to be in session at certain parts. I was trying to figure out when the hell Hogwarts has the end of the year exams so that I wasn't having scenes take place that require Hogwarts to be in session when Hogwarts wouldn't be in session. At first I thought it was the beginning of June which gave me a mini heart attack, but if I am reading it correctly, it could even be the end of June. I don't know if I will be able to make that date though. ::crosses fingers::

I'm not going to say if I am writing to a similar ending or a different one, but I am no longer writing to have it fit in the book and haven't been for quite sometime (which is why I was freaking out!).
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 11:45 pm (UTC)
I've found that I tend to over explain a topic with details while my husband doesn't. I don't know if communicating this way is a female versus male thing, it obviously crosses genders. I remember reading that more males tend to give the less detailed descriptions in conversations and it frustrates women because they want to know the tiniest details. I wish I could remember where I read the article :/

Ahh, Lupin. There's so many different opinions about his character. I have my own thoughts about him that's probably in the minority. Yeah the last book, JKR really is bad with continuity. Talk about Lupin having a split personality. If she explained more why Remus left Tonks, many people wouldn't think he was just a gay werewolf who really didn't want to marry Tonks and was running away from the situation. Personally I don't think those two should've ever gotten together, I just can't see it. Opposites can attract, but it's like JKR just threw them together so she could have Lupin have a kid. It's all too off in my book.

Glad I was able to clarify on why I thought this was going to lead up to the DH ending. Wouldn't Hogwart's school schedule run similar to other UK school schedules? Especially the schedules in Scotland? Is there a way you can look up the info on the web? Or maybe ask a few of your readers who are in the UK?
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 3rd, 2008 01:02 am (UTC)
Thanks for that info. That makes me feel better although I am still writing against the clock. Ack! Maybe the Death Eater would demand the students stay in school longer :p

I'm a tomboy so that may be write I tend to originally write very basic pieces and then I go back and flesh them out. My main beta is often telling me to expand upon sections and put in more details here and there. Any part you think needs more details, let me know and I will try to put them in. Sometimes I just don't know how to write them in.
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 3rd, 2008 12:16 am (UTC)
I wikied the Scotland academic school term :)

In Scotland, school begins in late August, and ends around late June or early July, usually in eastern counties from the third Monday in August to the first Friday in July and in western counties from the second Monday in August to the last Friday in June. Pupils attend school for approximately 190 days a year.[citation needed]

Most schools run a three-term school year and are structured as:

* Autumn term: Mid-August to December (October Holidays: One Week; Christmas Holidays: Two Weeks)
* Winter term: January to March (Easter Holidays: Two Weeks)
* Spring term: April to July (Summer Holidays: Six Weeks)
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 11:20 pm (UTC)
You know, I've wondered how a highly skilled potions master and a very suspicious one at that and who worked out all the angles for just about any situation, would so conveniently not take anti-venom potion or something that would stop him from bleeding to death. It's almost like Snape went to commit suicide, which is surprising since he always seemed to work so hard at staying alive. JKR seemed to not think through things properly in Snape's behalf :/
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 1st, 2008 11:54 pm (UTC)
It was my distinct impression that Snape committed suicide in Deathly Hallows. After Lily died, he wanted to die too and he decided to stay alive and keep Harry alive and safe from Voldemort. Now that Voldemort was going to die, he had no reason to live.
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 12:02 am (UTC)
The only reason I didn't think he commited suicide was the fear he seemed to start having when he realized what Voldemort was starting to think about the wand. I believe Snape was trying to get away and didn't expect to be killed. I think he may have thought it was a possibility because he took Lily's picture, but that he was hoping to "disappear" after the whole war was over.
[info]ginny88 wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 06:12 am (UTC)
Hi ! It's my first post here. I prefer to read Harry/Ginny fics and for slash, Harry/Snape :-) When I was reading DH, the one time that I was silently crying my eyes out was in the "Prince's Tale". How sad I felt that Snape died and his unrequited love/devotion to Lily Evans (I love angst!). Before DH came out, I'm with those that believe Snape is a "good" guy and was following Dumbledore's orders. And that chapter, so so so sad. I'm expecting him to die a hero's death, but was floored when I actually read him dying.

I ship Harry/Snape because I love the Dom/Sub aspect of it. In one shots, what we usually get are hot sex scenes. But for multi-chaptered, aside from the smut, readers are given more character development, exploring their nuiances, and for well written fics like yours, make a more realistic take on making this complicated relationship work out fine in the end.

I enjoy reading NOG and looking forward for the next storytelling.

And thanks for not making a bitchy Ginny :-) I know some writers can't help it coz they really hate how Jo wrote Ginny and she sunked their ships. But there are a lot of things going on about Ginny that's why there are Ginny fans out there, including myself. She's not perfect, she's also a flawed character, so this Ginny hate is something I find appalling. I've been to one journal of a slash writer and cringes at the vile and unmentionables they're saying against the H/G ship and Jo. I'm afraid to post coz I'll be burned at the stakes by this mob :-) It's one big "anti H/G and Jo EWE" orgy. Sigh, I just want to scream and say she's one of the richest women in the world and she's made something out of her talents, giving us this wonderful HP world! Ooops, sorry for ranting :-)
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 10:32 am (UTC)
Hello! I joined the websites you suggested, I think. I was having such trouble last night trying to join things...

I know!!!! Snape's death in DH made me sooooo sad. I wasn't into the series at all but I read them all in a row and afterwards I was like "must read and write Snape/Harry!" I read later that a lot of people fell out of the ship because of that, but it made me get into it. I didn't read a lot of fanfics at first until I found people to suggest them to me, but I watched a lot of youtube videos right after reading the books. There was this one, done before DH, that I really liked where Snape had fallen in love with Lily but she left him for James and he hated her for that and that was the real reason why he was mean to Harry. So I guess people were seeing passion and this strange/love hate relationship long before it was revealed in book 7.

And then, even if you take Lily completely out of it, and just have Snape be a normal straight bloke with other interests, you still have this epitome of Slytherin who is like Venus (calm and cold on the surface, burning with passion underneath) and the epitome of Gyrffindor who is all fire and passion and energy on the outside but is really very lonely and neglected inside. I just love the dynamics of their relationship, not matter what motivations you make for it.

Heheh, that's okay. I'm no Ginny basher. I didn't like her at first honestly, and then, in writing my fic, I had to flesh out her character and I was thinking that you only see of her what Harry sees of her and then I started thinking about what she'd actually be like (having 6 brothers myself) and it was sort of strange because I always IDed more with Hermione, but I felt a bit closer to Ginny after fleshing her out for my story (although I'd still be in Ravenclaw).

I'm afraid that Dream Ginny is a bit silly and you may not like her. Please remember that it is not representative of how she actually is in my fic, as they are Harry's dreams, he will see her in how he is currently feeling about her and what he wants and desires at the moment. So she will be: an aggressive temptress, an innocent school girl, a helpless maiden, a powerful ally, a mother figure, a wife, a friend, a sex object, etc

She is also his bastion of heternormativity and a promise of a happy ever after, so he's going to exaggerate her.
[info]ginny88 wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 02:58 pm (UTC)
Before DH, readers thought Snape is being mean to Harry because of the Marauders' bullying and though Lily defended Snape during one such time, I was surprised to read the back story in the "The Prince's Tale" that they were childhood friends and he's been in love with her for ages (sigh) and they have a falling out after he became interested in the dark arts. So yeah that unrequited love thing just make it sad.

The analogy you'd made contrasting Snape and Harry is spot on but as you put it, I find "them both lonely and neglected inside", always been the outsiders and misunderstood. This is what they have in common, however, Harry has a lot going on for him, after surviving Voldermort, he'll have time to be loved more by Ginny, his friends, the Weasleys, while Snape died a lonely man.

As I said, I love to read Harry/Snape stories, though I can imagine some people getting "squicked" by this pairing because of the age difference and if they're homophobic. So that's the challenge to Snarry writers, making this pairing's storyline realistic and characters you can emphatize with.

Ginny represents Harry's HEA and see her in rose-coloured glasses (canon). As you put it, she is "his bastion of heternormativity", but I don't mind Harry swinging the other way :-)
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 06:56 pm (UTC)
Yeah.... I know... Harry picked up on that in the 7th book. He says that he, Snape, and Voldemort were the "abandoned boys." Voldemort used his experiences and rejected love and thus ended up evil. Snape did not reject love but ended up living a rather miserable life because of who he tried to gain acceptance and respect (love) from. Harry did choose love over hate, but he was also more lucky than Snape in that he was sorted into a house which was more beneficial to setting him on the right path, and he had the idealized parents, which he could find psychological refuge in when his aunt and uncle were cruel.

Poor Snape ended up in Slytherin, so of course he would tend to allign himself with them and develop friendships between them which ultimately caused his downfall. He also had nowhere to turn when his parents were being cruel and neglectful. I imagine that his abusive/neglectful parents made him reluctant to trust or confide in authority figures, which would've been further enforced by the Hogwarts professor's preference of the marauders over him. I imagine that when he encountered an authority figure who treated him with respect and dignity (Voldemort originally), he jumped at a chance to join something where he could be respected, if not for what he was but what he did.

Yeah, one of my content betas is a friend of mine who has been into the series for a very long time and loves Draco/Harry. She says that Snape and Harry still sort of squicks her out even in my story because, in addition to the age difference, they have this teacher/pupil and almost this father/son relationship. I deliberately wrote it to be like that because, based on treatment of individuals with APD, that is exactly what Harry needs right now. I've been heavily influenced by traditions from other cultures where an older man takes on a younger boy and teaches him how to be a man while having a sexual relationship with him. It's a norm to me, but I can see why a lot of people find it squicky. A lot of people prefer gender-stratified homosexual relationships or age-stratified. My greatest preference is egalitarian ones, and that is the type that would suite Harry best in the long run, but right now, I think age-stratified is what he needs.

Based on the research I've done, I find the current divide between homosexuality and heterosexuality to be culturally constructed rather than biological in origin. The grouping is very reflective of our cultural preconceptions. I know it is entirely possible for an individual who physically prefers female bodies to find themselves in a relationship with a male bodied individual under the right circumstances and with the right person. From my research with primates, individuals who will only be sexual with other individuals of a certain sex are incredibly rare. "Bisexuality" is the norm.
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 09:09 pm (UTC)
My greatest preference is egalitarian ones, and that is the type that would suite Harry best in the long run, but right now, I think age-stratified is what he needs.

Damn, does this mean no happy Snarry ending? ;) I wouldn't mind Harry and Draco either. I like both these pairings.

From my research with primates, individuals who will only be sexual with other individuals of a certain sex are incredibly rare.

Are you talking about actual experience, or including fantasies also? Because then I'm a rare one, I've never met an actual female I wanted to have sex with. I completely utterly adore males and everything about them. I think females are more beautiful bodily wise, but it's males, their brains, brawn, and all that testosterone that I find exciting. Maybe that's why I love slash so much, lol ^_^

I'm in a rush to do errands, so I'll comment to your earlier post to me later.
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 09:33 pm (UTC)
I feel for there to be a happy ending and not a messed up one, either their relationship has to change or Harry has to end up with someone else. I think for Harry to always remain in the role of student/son would be highly pathological for him. In order to have a healthy, functional long term relationship with Snape, Snape has to treat him like an equal and he has to feel like an equal.

I feel strongly about this with Harry based on his past. I don't really like BDSM fics with Harry where he is the sub (I know I'm in the minority on this) because I find it very pathological based on his life history. It seems to me that he would simply be replacing one abuser for another. I've known some people who were abused as children and then sub in BDSM relationships as adults and they are the most fucked up people ever (not that the relationship made them fucked up, but because they were fucked up, they sought out that type of relationship). I'm fine with Harry being dom in BDSM with Draco (and I have some very hot fics of that type in my favorites), but I just can't see Snape being sub, so I prefer a very egalitarian relationship for them if they are to be together long term.

So possible endings are: 1. Harry and Snape learn how to have an egalitarian relationship and live happily together 2. Snape and Harry never can have that relationship and they have a very pathological relationship that is unhealthy for Harry. 3. Harry gets with someone other than Snape and is provided with the relationship he needs. 4. One or both of them die and the whole issue is avoided entirely!

If you were a bonobo where sex between females was not only more common on average than sex between males, you would most, most likely have female sexual partners that you prefer. I would place good money on your lack of sexual experience with females due to cultural practices rather than biological ones.
[info]whitestar_alpha wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 11:29 pm (UTC)
I agree with not wanting Harry and Snape to have a messed up dominance based relationship. The fics I've read where they're more or less equal, learning from each other, but still with their own unique personalities are the fics I like best.

I'd love to read the Harry/Draco fics if you have the links. I can give you my email addy if you prefer sending the links that way.

Somehow I don't have much hope for the Snarry ending. I think the two are just too far apart intellectually and emotionally. Snape seems like he's restraining himself from the way he wants to behave, and is only treating Harry decently because it works into Snape's plans or his guilt. I think there really isn't much of a happy ending for them together. Maybe some resolution that they don't hate each other as much and go there separate ways. I wonder if Harry will ever feel comfortable enough to talk about his relationship with Snape while in prison with his friends? Or if he'll always feel ashamed or uncomfortable about it?

Haha, you had me wiki "Bonobo" ^_^ I wanted to grow up to be a wildlife biologist but that never happened :( You discussing animal research is very, very interesting for me. I also contemplated majoring in psychology or sociology, so the background you create for the characters and the reasons they behave and think a certain way is also intriguing. It's likely what you say about me and societal influence is true about females.
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 11:51 pm (UTC)
I think Harry telling others would depend on how he felt about the relationship in general. I can't say much more right now. :x

I love ethology. If everything works out, I hope to spend this summer studying this species of monkeys called Squirrel monkeys which have very interesting social systems based on their ecological distribution. Based on research others have conducted, it appears that ecology influences the spacing of females, which influences the bonding of females, which in turns affects sex dominance. So, depending on where you go, you can find Squirrel monkeys that are male dominanted, female dominated, or egalitarian. One species in particular is very interesting to me in that the males who had the most testosterone convert excess testosterone to estrogen and get really, really bulky. The females fight each other over the chance to mate with these bulky males who pick and chose among these pushy ladies.

I hope to conduct a study of the female-dominated ones and examine how the relationships among the females allow them to dominate the males. We will see if I can get the grants necessary for it. ::crosses fingers::
[info]japonicastar wrote:
Feb. 3rd, 2008 12:43 pm (UTC)
Well I'm hoping for number one on possible endings, because I'm a complete sap for hapy endings. It's like a waste of a story having a sad ending. Maybe that's me being unrealistic but that's why I prefer fanfics over real life!

I agree with you on the dom/sub thing, as it squicks me something chronic. You read a perfectly good fic and they decide to become pet and master and I'm like "Uh why?!" as it never occured to me that Harry that Harry would want to be ordered around doing what he's told when it during the books all he did was disobey people.

Sorry to butt into your conversation by the way, I enjoy reading what authors have to say about their work. :)
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 3rd, 2008 06:09 pm (UTC)
Yes.... my story contains a lot of those elements (ie, Harry choosing to submit to the Death Eaters rather than fight them in the throne room, him playing the submissive slave to Snape, etc) but I've tried to keep it very true to his very stubborn and willfull character. If at anytime you think "he would never do that" please let me know.
(Anonymous) wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 01:27 pm (UTC)
i dont like ginny.still i couldnt imagine ginny with be malfoy.maybe snape use draco for revenge.okey okey i guees i'm very dreamy:)

i readed wuthering heights .heathnliff is very cruel.i hope snape doesnt similar heathnliff in this story.

ps:im sorry my english.
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 06:34 pm (UTC)
That's okay, I have trouble with my english too! That's why I am writing this story. :)
[info]foreignpop wrote:
Feb. 2nd, 2008 07:42 pm (UTC)
It's so cool that you're reading this even though English isn't your first language! What a great way to learn!

[info]kitsu wrote:
Feb. 6th, 2008 02:58 am (UTC)
Yay new chapter! I like the literary connections you make.
(Anonymous) wrote:
Feb. 11th, 2008 04:54 am (UTC)
Really great fanfic!
I've been following it ever since I found it last week :D I really like the way you're drawing everything out instead of squishing events together. It seems much more realistic than it would if there weren't so many well-placed details. keep it up, I'll be awaiting new chapters with bated breath.

-J.M.C.
[info]kibatsu wrote:
Feb. 11th, 2008 05:48 am (UTC)
Re: Really great fanfic!
Thanks, there are some more published beyond this if you go to my livejournal main page. I normally link them together every five chapters or so.
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